Red Carpet

Oscars Red Carpet 2016

Awards season is OOOOOVERRRRRR. And not a minute too soon, honestly because I feel like this year’s showing has been rough city. Since I know you’re all wondering, I wore custom extra baggy sweatpants with “Cuse” written on the left leg in zebra print (REPRESENT) paired with a men’s thermal long sleeve shirt (no bra, obviously) and Saturday night’s hair–tousled to perfection (slept in.) Let’s see how the stars compared…

WORST:

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

What fresh hell is this?

At first I only saw the back and had high hopes for the front…but womp wompp the front is long pasties essentially.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

I’d be so down with this dress if it was strapless and the weird pocket swoops didn’t happen.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Oh Jared, you cut the ombre pony and then wear this? It’s all wrong.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Emily normally kills it but I’m not in love with this color or style on her.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Not her best.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Not to be confused with Oprah…a woman with a chest tat and a diamond spider on her hand.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

MEH.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

This is an Easter egg bridesmaid gown ‘splosion.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

The diamond cutout, the curtains material, the 90’s platforms–all make for worst dressed.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

This looks like something Goldie Hawn would wear in First Wives Club. (I don’t even know where that came from…don’t question it.)

BEST:

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

To be honest I didn’t fall over backward for this look, as I’ve been known to do with anything Rachel wears. That sideboob though, scandal.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Jennifer is elegant AF.

KATE & LEO! Giving the people what they want, walking the red carpet as Jack and Rose, if Jack didn’t die in freezing cold waters. Credit where credit is due, Kate tried something completely different here and looks like a sexbomb. Leo brings it out in her, prob.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

These two are always looking fresh and adding a baby bump to the mix didn’t change a thing.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Julianne puts a twist on the classic black gown.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Love the matching necklace

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Our two purple beauties B2B, Reese looks like she doesn’t age ever.

jlaw

Normally hate ruffles but you can’t deny JLaw looks like a hot piece here.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Lady Gaga in a classy white jumpsuit, minimal jewels and makeup! Go, gurl.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Was this the only red of the night? That’s one way to stand out. The other is to have a slit down to your belly button.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Sarah looks probably the best I’ve ever seen her look.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Seacrest looking sharp as ever in a grey jacket.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

This is easily my favorite man look of the night. Michael looks fresh 2 death.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

I love this color on her, wish the bottom hem wasn’t bubbled like that.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Normally don’t go for the all-over sparkles but she looks gr8.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Damn I wish she wore her hair down because she has perfect hair always in Quantico but this dress is the stuff.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Eddie Redmayne doesn’t have a stylist and him and the wifey consistently look like fashionistas on the red carpet.

88th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

Fun fact: Liev picked out this dress for Naomi and even though there’s a lot going on there I think she crushes it.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

I did a double take because I don’t think I’ve ever seen Sacha lookin this good. Isla looks fab even though it looks like she’s wearing an ocean-themed shower curtain.

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

Brie looking like a dime and also forcing Ryan Seacrest to mop up his drool as he interviews her and yaps about how everything she says is SO AWESOME.

FAVE LOOK OF THE NIGHT:

88th Annual Academy Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 28 Feb 2016

I just really love this color. Plus she looks like a stunner.

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Red Carpet

Grammy’s 2016 Red Carpet

WORST:

Lady Gaga

COME ON.

Janelle Monae

At first glance I thought she was holding a giant sun hat in front of her crotch. Nope, it’s just the dress. Glad she escaped old timey prison for the red carpet though.

Jaxon Bieber, Justin Bieber

DIRT STACHE.

Florence Welch

I think this is what they call “eclectic”. I call it arts and crafts.

Ciara

Ciara feels like she needs to show off her labia in hopes of tricking her boyfriend into having sex with her.

Nick Lachey, Vanessa Lachey

I miss Nick  & Jess.

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

Major key: Black tuxes are slimming. (Unless you’re bigger than a house.)

Giuliana Rancic

WUT IS THIS.

Tori Kelly

Love Tor Tor but this dress makes her look fat and I know she is NOT.

Grammy Awards 2016

Hey Bow Wow thanks for stopping by in your lace bib.

Selena Gomez

SEL, where’s your prom date?

Tove Lo

We get it Tove Lo, you’re badass.

Serayah

Serayah (sp?) has made the full transformation to Bad Girl RiRi

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

MULLET. MULL.ET. BIZ IN THE FRONT, PARTY IN THE BACK.

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

Cam’s dress got caught in the paper shredder, apparently.

Kimberly Schlapman

Sooks to have the same color combo as T.Swift but look worse.

Karen Fairchild

Wonder how long it will take to get this dress off? Don’t get drunk Karen, you’ll be untying all night.

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Only Pharrell would roll through with white shades, a pearl necklace, his grandma’s sweater and a graphic tee. I can only hope the tee said something about brunch because Pharrell is white girl wasted in this getup.

BEST:

Mya

I didn’t even think Mya was still a thing but she looks bangin.

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

Don’t hate the darker locks.

Anna Kendrick

Classy AND hawt.

Charlie Puth

SPARKLE TUX! (insert jazz hands)

Alessandra Ambrosio

Every musician who attended these awards should be embarrassed because Alessandra just did the damn thing.

Chrissy Teigen, John Legend

POWER COUPLE.

Ariana Grande

I’m jelly of how skinny Ariana is .

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

Convinced Sam lost weight because Adele is back and he needs to remind everyone he still exists.

Demi Lovato

The new pantsuit. Elegant as hell with a few can tabs tossed in the mix.

Jack Antonoff

Jack is looking spiffy.

Entertainment: 58th Grammy Awards

Maroon suit GET AT ME.

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

My Valentine ❤

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

GOAT

Taylor Swift

I know it’s controversial of me to include this on my best dressed. But WHATEVA. I like it. She looks skinny AF and I bet she can sit with her legs wide open because she has built in shorts. I respect it. Obviously the Anna Wintour hair isn’t as welcome but it’s better than the slicked updo. END RANT. (Update: after seeing the dress move when she walked onstage, the underpiece actually looks like a diaper. So that’s weird.)

The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Red Carpet

Shocking twist: I don’t hate this.

Kaley Cuoco

Ugh whatever Kaley, we get it you’re in shape.

Adele

This picture doesn’t do her outfit justice, she’s such a skini minnie now.

FAVE LOOK OF THE NIGHT:

 

ELLIE! From left field! Everything crushes about this look.

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Red Carpet

SAG Awards Red Carpet

I’d like to personally thank the SAGs for being on a Saturday night and thus giving me the perfect pre-going out drinking game. Good lookin out, Hollywood. Also personal thanks to Brad Goreski of E!’s red carpet for chatting it up with a celeb for a bit and then going “so I’m done speaking with you” to get her outta there. Smooth.

WORST:

The 22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Hey Susan, you’re 100. Put your SAGgy T’s away.

Uzo Aduba

CHRISTMAS TINSEL.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO KIT FROM A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

WUF. Keith, your boy band chunky highlights. Nicole, your sparkly clown dress. Pull it together, guys.

The 22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

I wanna be on Team Brie but this dress sucks. The rips and cords holding it together is dumb.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Oh, look, a piñata!

Ellie Kemper

“She looks fine.”-my friend Lindsey

The 22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

I’m pretty sure Gabrielle wore this same number to Beverly Hills High’s Senior Prom.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Serenity by Jan coming in hot with a hideous Leopard number, a sassy pose, and a mom hair flip.

Giuliana Rancic

Keep doing you, G. And by you, I mean making everyone on the red carpet uncomfy, obv.

Anna Faris

Not my fave turtleneck dress.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

I was fine with this until my friend pointed out the tiered design, SO I GUESS WE’RE BEING PICKY.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

I don’t love the low cut cleave shot without the cleave.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Worst dressed sisters!

Julianne Moore

JULIANNE!!! WHO TOLD YOU TO WEAR THIS?! You always look like a dime.

Mayim Bialik

MY EYES.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Is this one of the new Barbies?

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

She landed on this list because that face. Sry n0t Sarry.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Naht flattering.

BEST:

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

TOP. DOG. the GOAT.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

All hail the bun.

Rachel McAdams

Rumor is this might be a two piece. Either way, love it hard.

Kristen Wiig

She actually has a pony, and it looked gr8. Love the onesie action too.

Queen Latifah

Queenie looking like a skinny mini!!!

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

So glad to have Tina Fey back and looking like a red ballerina.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

This chick is a precious flower until she opens her mouth and that accent takes over.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

What a fab party dress!

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Sarah looks like a babe…even with glasses and a ‘stache.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Love the beads, love the color, love the style. WiN.

Amy Poehler

I actually like the dark hair on Amy and her knockers look top notch.

The 22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Can never hate on purple. This top half is different and kewl.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Diggin on dat blue.

The 22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Eva is a forever smoke.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Boom. Plaid suit.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

WERK THOSE SLIPPERS, GRL. RESPECT.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Even though she has mom hair her “Angelina Jo-Leg” is on fleek.

Laverne Cox

This is my damn color. (I’m starting to get wine buzzed. I will not apologize for my captions.)

Ariel Winter

This is the best Ariel has ever looked on a red carpet. Her boobs are a normal size and this black dress is perf.

22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

What a baller. Shot caller.

The 22nd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Red Carpet

Beautiful red dress, snappy tux.

MY FAVORITE LOOK OF THE NIGHT:

Kiernan Shipka

Different color, unique pattern & supes flattering.

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Red Carpet

Critics Choice Awards Red Carpet

I can’t say I’ve ever watched the Critics Choice Awards before, but I think I’m down with them now. People are winning for things I actually watched and they just allowed Amy Schumer to stand onstage for like 5 minutes saying whatever the hell she felt like. Those five minutes alone were better than the entire Golden Globes this year. Anyway, here’s the top and bottom looks of the night. (Disclaimer: there are 0 men on this list…apparently no boys were allowed on the red carpet or something.)

WORST:

niecynash

Girl, this makes you look like a frumpy wad of cotton candy. I don’t know why she just didn’t borrow from Chanel #5’s closet.

wendimclendon-covey

This is a super unfortunate flappy armpit fabric sitch.

mjblige

MJ Blige showing off her bicep tats with these sleeves.

zoekravitz

Creamsicle, dreamsicle.

melissamccarthy

Better than the Golden Globes Hefty bag but still not quite there.

januaryjones

Lite Brite Dress

jennifer-aniston-justin-theroux-critics-choice-awards-2016

Slow your roll with that slit, Jen. Could she have made it easier for a little under-the-table funny business?

rachel-bloom

One shoulder tops give me a very early 2000’s MK&A vibe.

mayim-bialik

Did she get dressed in the 17th century, question mark

sarah-paulson_0

I imagine this is what Wednesday Addams would wear if she was into sparkles.

BEST:

constancezimmer

Classic look for a winner.

shiriappleby

Let’s talk about the fact that she just gave birth like 4 minutes ago and looks like a dime.

livtyler

If I wore this dress I would also look like I was 3 months pregnant. Liv actually is.

americaferrara

A classy black party dress is always hot stuff.

emmyrossum

Now this is how you do a slit.

amyschumer

Amy looks like a smokeshow.

marissa-tomei

sAsSy & SaH CaYooTe

krysten-ritter

Perfect hair, perfect dress.

lesie-judd1

Both tulle looks from last night make me want a tutu real bad.

gina-rodriguez

What a vision.

kirsten-dunst

Normally tiered dresses like this are super unflattering but Kirsten’s so damn skinny that she pulls it off.

hayden-p

NIPS OUT FOR THE BOYS! Hayden’s back!

Fave look of the night/Girl Boner:

rachelmcadams

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Red Carpet

Golden Globes Red Carpet 2016

Since I’m immature I still watch E’s red carpet (I assume everyone does) and this year’s highlights included Giuliana being the most awkward bird alive-as always. She did a weird light saber fight with the kid from Room, asked everyone uncomfy questions and tried to make it all about herself. On the other hand, we had Ryan Seacrest whose approach to red carpet chat was throwing celebs together whether they had met or not. The best pair being Jennifer Lawrence and Katy Perry. As Katy blubbered on, J.Law gave a polite smile while her eyes said that she hated Katy and her Jersey Shore trash hair.

WORST:

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

This isn’t your time to shine girl. Take your bumpit and go home.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Red Carpet Arrivals

Mark Ruffalo with The Lovely Bones rape glasses.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

I have a strong feeling that Kate Winslet has worn this dress before.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

This dress doubles as a Mummy costume.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Curtains for the drawing room.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Red Carpet Arrivals

I’m beginning to believe that Maggie just plays into always wearing something hideous. She’s got to be in on the joke at this point.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

When will people learn that ruffles are never flattering.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Sparkle trash bag

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

This is a whole lot.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Please see my ruffles  comment above.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Not in love with the dusty pink and vag golden leaves.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

1 fish, 2 fish, red fish, blue fish.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

Gina usually blows me away and this was just alright. But it does have pockets, which is every girl’s dream.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

I hate all aspects of this dress. It looks like something Kacey Musgraves would wear with her honkin cowboy boots and a hat.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 10 Jan 2016

HOW did he get invited to this? Do you think he just stumbled upon the red carpet and starting throwing around finger gunz?! You just got HOFFED.

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“This black dress is kinda boring, let’s glue a giant bow to the front”- a rich designer, probably.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

The sequin overload is blinding and THEN there’s a cape.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

The glittery fire flames on her chest, though.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

What’s with the sparkle factory throw up trend?

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

My annoyance of Maria is no secret but is she for serious with this cleavage?

Golden Globe Awards 2016-Arrivals

I mean I don’t really need to see proof that Nancy O’Dell got a Brazilian before she hit the carpet.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

This is a weird jumpsuit sitch.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

I love a good crop coord but the matching choker ruined this whole deal. Also if this is what abs look like on a girl I’m fine not having them.

US-ENTERTAINMENT-GOLDEN-GLOBE-ARRIVALS

No thank you to the double breasted buttons

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

I actually originally liked this look for JLo, you know cause her bits are covered and she still looks amahzing. But then my friend pointed out she looks like mustard and ketchup and now I can’t unsee it.

BEST:

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 10 Jan 2016

SHE’S 70. DAMN.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Lick.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Love a good blue suit.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Julianne is another one who always wears almost exactly the same dress but whatevs cause it ain’t broke.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

I hated Michael B. Jordan when I was forced to watch him every week instead of Riggins on FNL. But he’s so fiery hot lately that I’ve forgiven him.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

J.Law can do no wrong.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

For the love of God, will somebody please give this man an award?

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

Julia always brings the heat.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Sassy patterned suit jacket.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 10 Jan 2016

She looks ***Flawless.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

The red on red is working in Amy’s favor.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Classy and flattering for Queenie

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

I don’t LOVE how flat this dress makes my #1 girl crush look, but I will never put her on the worst dressed. I just can’t.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

A.Schu is killin it

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Jenna looks like a dime, Channing’s piecy combover is really ruining things here.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Sparkles that aren’t over the top

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Taraji is always fierce. Of course she has a cape.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Don’t know how to pronounce her name but she looks gorge.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Embodied kewl couple, she looks like a smoke, he’s wearing kicks with a tux.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

The only hot pink I saw and I’m INTO it.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

This one threw me for a loop. Kirsten is looking goooood.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Oh, David. Your suit game is so on point.

Brie looks like a golden goddess.

alancumming

Since I’ve been aggressively mean to his outfits in the past, here’s a nice look with sneaks that I basically own.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

I actually really like this color on her and clearly she has the flat mid section for love handle cutouts, unlike myself.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

Honestly all hail Sophia Bush.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Love the style and color of this gown.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Sam Smith giving it to me with that scruff.

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

America’s a skinny mini now!

73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, America - 10 Jan 2016

RED HOT.

NBC's "73rd Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

Keeping it simple is usually the way to go.

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This was a little surprising that Bob Odenkirk was keeping it spicy and trendy.

MY FAVORITE LOOK OF THE NIGHT:

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Red Carpet, Uncategorized

AMA’s 2015 Red Carpet

I guess E! is just as excited to jumpstart awards season as I am because they started red carpet coverage at dinner time. Giuliana was unbearable interviewing actual celebrities so I can’t even begin to imagine what the first hour of the red carpet was like when nobody was there. Especially since her riveting line of questions included “what’s the difference between American girls and Australian girls, no bullshit answer.” Leave it to G to ask the hard-hitting Q’s. We only have more of that to look forward to in the coming winter months.

WORST:

Screen Shot 2015-11-22 at 11.27.38 PM

This is Tove Lo and it’s possible she had the worst dress of the night. When asked about it she said all the important parts are on display. Thank you for showing us your pikachu and rack, Tove. Here in America we don’t love that.

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BARRETTES. CHLOE GRACE MORETZ IS WEARING BARRETTES AND A BLACK CHOKER.

kyliejenner

Sucks that you have to walk the red carpet with your supermodel sister but like wearing dominatrix leather only made things worse.

paulaabdul

PAULA. You’re 53! I do NOT want to see your RB curts.

rebel

There has got to be a better way for Rebel to dress for her body type than this trash bag.

frankiegrande

What a subdued outfit for such a shy personality.

jennymccarthy

I have no words.

christinamilian

OMG Slutty Cindy Lou Who!

juliannehough

Not only is this impractical because every time she walks she flashes everyone AND her 90’s platforms make her travel at a snail’s pace, but it’s also butt ugly.

haileesteinfeld

I feel like this is a real front and back wedgie sitch waiting to happen.

ashleybenson

Ashley Benson is ready to take on a job interview.

biebs

Leave it to Biebs to wear a tee of a band he knows nothing about with some ripped jeans like a punk.

demi

The dress isn’t the worst thing in the world but this vamp hair/makeup is killing me.

gwen

Gwen has transformed into a skanky black butterfly!

giulianarancic

mEh.

danicamckellar

This is a prom dress. 100%.

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HARRY. Gawd. This suit. Also, trim those locks.

BEST:

selena

selena back

This isn’t my favorite Selena look but she’s still pulling it off.

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3 out of 4 in 1D dressed like suave gentlemen and I commend them for that.

kelseaballerini

Kelsea Ballerini showing off tasteful cleavage–take notes, Christina Milian.

wilmervalderrama

Wilmer would’ve upstaged Demi if they posed togets.

charlieputh

Charlie Puth keeping things spicy in a red suit.

COULD be a longer frock, but Kendall never really looks bad, especially when she stands next to Kylie.

lukebryan

Can always count on Luke to look droolworthy. His wife’s alright, I guess.

hannahdavis

I don’t LOVE this but it’s not horrendous enough to hit the worst dressed. Something weird’s happening around her boob region and I don’t know that Jeets would approve.

meghantrainor

Kinda hard to mess anything up with a plain black dress

nickjonas

Turtleneck CHIC.

5sos

I wanted to post this picture because it made me laugh out loud. The lead singer/guy HAMMING in the white shirt is clearly the hottest group member and he knows it. The one on the right is trying, but can’t compete with white shirt’s natural sex appeal.

ciara

Ciara wore this scandalous dress showing off her hot bod to be STUCK in the T-mobile corner for the entire show.

carrie

I can get down with a little cape from time to time. I think Carrie’s rockin it.

gigi

I went back and forth on this one for a while. On the one hand this is a whole lot. On the other hand Gigi has the perfect model bod and looks smokin hot.

zendaya

Congrats to Zendaya who made the best dressed list for dressing the most normal she’s ever dressed. She’s going all Lilly Pulitzer on us.

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Red Carpet, Television

CMA Awards Red Carpet 2015

I particularly love doing Country red carpets because they’re the only awards shows where the men have equally as sassy outfits, if not more eye-grabbing than their lady counterparts. Don’t eva try to hold a country man down with their loud print suits and staple headwear. So even though most of you look like you scrapped together suits from the leftovers at a seamstress, I applaud you for keeping things spicy and going there instead of sticking to a boring black tux.

WORST:

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Chase Bryant attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Exhibit A of above rant. Shiny teal patterned jacket, chesties, and Jimmy Neutron hair. Thanks for being you, men of country.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Karen Fairchild of Little Big Town attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

I want to like this but it looks like she’s wearing a dress with spiderwebs all over it. And I really hate spiders.

Kimberly Schlapman, of Little Big Town, arrives at the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on Wednesday, Nov. 4, 2015, in Nashville, Tenn. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP)

Sweet black armpit flaps.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: (L-R) Jay DeMarcus, Gary LeVox, and Joe Don Rooney of Rascal Flatts attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

Thank God one of them wore black or this would’ve been a real eye sore sitch for Rascal. Oh wait…

04 Nov 2015, Nashville, Tennessee, USA --- 04 November 2015 - Nashville, Tennessee - Kimberly Williams-Paisley. 49th CMA Awards, Country Music's Biggest Night, held at Bridgestone Arena. Photo Credit: Laura Farr/AdMedia --- Image by © Laura Farr/AdMedia/AdMedia/Corbis

Seems like maybe Kimberly bought this dress off Etsy.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Musician Ashley Monroe attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Jon Kopaloff/FilmMagic)

I think wrapping a hot pink twin bedsheet around my body for a toga party in college was more flattering than this.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Musician Jason Aldean attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Jason will probably never make my best dressed list, so I hope he’s kewl with that.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Actress Erika Christensen attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

This is the epitome of a horrendous bridesmaids dress from 1993. Also why is Erika Christensen at the CMAs?

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Musician Steven Tyler attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

You know what would be really wild? If Steven showed up in a slick tuxedo. That would turn some heads.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Preston Brust (L) and Chris Lucas of LoCash Cowboys attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

We have a TRUCKER HAT. I REPEAT, A TRUCKER HAT. And once you get past the shock of 2003 Ashton Kutcher, a white fedora, matching jacket combo deal.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer Danielle Bradbery attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Not really understanding this idea of sheer paneled legs. Just wear a short dress and call it a day.

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No thank you, Jennifer Nettles.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Musician Scotty McCreery attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Jon Kopaloff/FilmMagic)

He’s already pretty creeps and then throws on an embroidered jacket so that didn’t really help things.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Dan Smyers and Shay Mooney of Dan + Shay attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

The hair ruins everything for me here. Gelled pompadours AREN’T cool.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer Cam attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

This dress reminds me of a mix between banana peels and leaves, either way it’s too weird

BEST:

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Songwriter Kyle Jacobs and musical artist Kellie Pickler attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

This is really classy and elegant, especially for 1 out of 100 country awards. You go, grl.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Musical duo Lennon & Maisy attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

Why couldn’t the Conrad sisters perform? THAT would be must-see TV.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Kacey Musgraves attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

Kacey threw me a curveball tonight. No arts and crafts accessories, no beehive hairstyle, she just looks pretty.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: John Osborne and T.J. Osborne of Brothers Osborne attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

Beard’s got a weird jacket vibe going on but leather jacket Osborne is doing all sorts of things for me.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Lee Ann Womack attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

LeAnn with a sassy little frock. Showing Carrie she’s not the only country singer with stems!

04 November 2015 - Nashville, Tennessee - Thomas Rhett, Lauren Gregory. 49th CMA Awards, Country Music's Biggest Night, held at Bridgestone Arena. Photo Credit: Laura Farr/AdMedia

Thomas Rhett was out shined by his smokeshow wife and her dress that I’m obsessed with.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer Miranda Lambert attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

What do you do when you’re about to see your ex-husband in front of the cameras for the first time? Dye your hair pink, duh.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Sam Hunt attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

A fall-influenced suit. Hell yeah.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Cole Swindell attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

I’m willing to overlook the baseball cap for this spicy burgundy suit on Cole.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Model Hannah Davis attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Slow whistle for the future Mrs. Jeter. Hot diggity damn.

Justin Timberlake arrives at the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on Wednesday, Nov. 4, 2015, in Nashville, Tenn. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP)

Everyone knows all JT needs to do is show up and he makes my best dressed list. Shameless.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Recording artist Luke Bryan attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Luke never fails to dazzle me but all I need from his is a white tee and baseball cap.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Recording artist Brett Eldredge attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

My boo.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Actor Riley Smith attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

Latest installment of “if you guest star on Nashville you get an invite to the CMA’s.” I don’t hate it. More Riley Smith for me!

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Recording artist Darius Rucker attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

I may hate Hootie gone country but I can respect tha hell outta this bloutfit.

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I can get all down with this salsa number.

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Didn’t get enough hot pink tonight and I like this one a lot. David Nail you look nice as well.

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All because two people fell in love…they get invites to every Hollywood event ever. All in on Shawn’s suit, hard pass on Kaitlyn’s dress. I’ve seen a bajillion better outfits on her.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Musical duo Shawna Thompson and Keifer Thompson of Thompson Square attend the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)

Thompson Square looking glam city.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Cassadee Pope attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Usually the one sleeve thing is a little jarring but I’m alright with this scandal.

04 November 2015 - Nashville, Tennessee - Jana Kramer, Mike Caussin. 49th CMA Awards, Country Music's Biggest Night, held at Bridgestone Arena. Photo Credit: Laura Farr/AdMedia *** Please Use Credit from Credit Field ***

If you follow Jana on insta, you would know she’s preggers because she makes sure to directly comment on her bump in every post so it makes perfect sense that her hand is essentially glued to her baby belly on the red carpet. Also fist bump for putting the pregnancy rack on display.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Kelsea Ballerini attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Princess Kelsea. Glad she made it to the CMA’s this year because her songs are fire flames and she’s a little cutie.

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Dustin Lynch attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

Ignore the stupid pose, ignore the stupid pose.

Kimberly Perry, of The Band Perry, arrives at the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on Wednesday, Nov. 4, 2015, in Nashville, Tenn. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP)

The Sleek Perry

NASHVILLE, TN - NOVEMBER 04: Singer-songwriter Tyler Farr attends the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on November 4, 2015 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by John Shearer/WireImage)

I love this peacoat material jacket. Sophisticated AND trendy.

Reid Perry, of The Band Perry, arrive at the 49th annual CMA Awards at the Bridgestone Arena on Wednesday, Nov. 4, 2015, in Nashville, Tenn. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP)

I laughed out loud when I saw Perry Bro 1 with his messy bun and realized this is EXACTLY what my hair looks like when I toss it up at the end of the day. Not sure if that’s a commentary on me or him.

Fave Look of the Night:

November 4, 2015 Nashville, Tn. Carrie Underwood 49th Annual Country Music Association Awards held at the Bridgestone Arena © Curtis Hilbun / AFF-USA.COM

She may have 12 outfit changes throughout the evening but her red carpet look did it for me.

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Red Carpet

Emmys 2015 Red Carpet

Back in biz with legit–no one is shouting profanities at each other or declaring their upcoming run for office–awards shows. Let’s get right to it.

PS I’d like to formally apologize for the abrupt change in picture size, I did this really hilarious and cool thing called dumping a glass of water on my macbook this weekend (woooooo party animal) and had to get ratchet to deliver this red carpet blog–half done on my phone, half on the computer. Shout out to mah bestie for loaning me her laptop for the night. True friends loan electronics for a completely unnecessary and inconsequential blog post. Needlepoint THAT on a pillow.

WORST:

   christina-hendricks

Girl, we get it. Ya got some yabbos. Don’t need to always see them.

giuliana-rancic-emmys-2015-emmy-awards

Do Less, Giulz.

heidi-klum-03-290

I don’t understand how this is a finished product.

kiernan-shipka-01-290

This girl is 15, and I get that when you’re 15 you want to wear a cute top and leggings, but like not on a red carpet.

laura-prepon-emmys-2015-emmy-awards

Completely unnecessary embroidered shoulder hat.

mindykaling

It kills me to do this but I sincerely hate this mustard bottle color. I know she can look more glam, she crushes it ever other time.

sarah-paulson

She literally looks like a statue in this.

tatiana-maslany

This outfit gives Tatiana an unfortunate jenis, err I guess since she’s wearing a tuxedo, a tuxenis.

Chains were apparently suuupes trend-doggs this year. I don’t love it. I also don’t love Hugh’s woof bedhead.

Eye sore dress.

Maisie decided to turn the Emmy’s into MK&A’s Sleepover Party, I guess.

  

I don’t know, I’m just not feeling anything about this look.

It certainly is Amy’s year but c’mon. This is not a flattering pick. Props for the hand fan though, I used to love setting that bad boy up on my desk at school only to have an immature little grubber stick his fingers in it while it was running.

Look! It’s the just sewn together cupcake.

  

Besides the very 70’s curtains bottom, that bright blue smokey eye is roof stooof.

I quite literally shrieked in fear when I saw this. American Horror Story is correct.

Matt LeBlanc looks like he’s working red carpet security detail. Bruh, act like you’ve been here before.

I feel like the Emmy’s aren’t the place to leave nothing to the imagination.

BEST:

ariel-winter

Getting a breast reduction may have been slapping God in the face, but these warlocks look fab now. Very subtle and elegant.

amy-poehler

Amy with the sassy cutouts, grrrrllll new hair, new you!

aubrey-plaza

Aubrey is smiling and showing sass leg!

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 20: Actress Gina Rodriguez attends the 67th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards at Microsoft Theater on September 20, 2015 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)

Gina always nails it, looking like a pretty princess

maggie-gyllenhaal-emmys-2015-emmy-awards

Quite possibly the only time Maggie has ever graced my best dressed. My friend thought her tan was too much but I can dig all up on this dress. She has a body! And doesn’t look like a frumpy aunt. STEPS IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION, MAGZ.

padma-lakshmi-emmys-2015-emmy-awards

How anyone can wear a dress this tight and not have the mint they ate before hitting the carpet visible is beyond me, but Padma looks like a smokeshow.

regina-king-emmys-2015-emmy-awards

Regina wearing a dress that reminds me of A Cinderella Story, coincidence?

rico-rodriguez-435

Modern Family kiddies dress better than half the adults in the room. Smooth.

IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR THE TELEVISION ACADEMY - Robin Wright arrives at the 67th Primetime Emmy Awards on Sunday, Sept. 20, 2015, at the Microsoft Theater in Los Angeles. (Photo by Dan Steinberg/Invision for the Television Academy/AP Images)

This dress accentuates her bod and not in a “gawd mom stop trying so hard” way

sarah-hyland

Gr8 fall color and perfect fit.

taraji-henson

This is a little on the scandalous side, but it wouldn’t be Taraji if it wasn’t. (Again with the 2chainz though)

uzo-aduba-emmys-2015-emmy-awards

The best pink look of the night! Uzo looks fab.

Julie Bowen kept it simple and crushed it.

Sassy suits and setting an example for red carpet bros.

Wears the same dress every red carpet and yet, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.

This is a lot, but at the same time fits well and she’s workin it.

Matching lips and dress combo deal

Emma went ole Hollywood glam on this one and I’m all aboard.

LADY GAGA LOOKS LIKE A HUMAN. I REPEAT, NORMAL GAGA.

Billy looking sharp with a little front highlight.

Tina usually keeps it black and white and it’s timeless

I like Naomi’s dress by itself but I’m really digging these two looks togets.

January came in red hot with a onesie giving me some Little Mermaid vibes, in a good way.

  I would like this dress, pls. Black floral deetz and a cutout for party in the midriff–can’t go wrong. Fave dress of the night!

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Red Carpet

TIFF Red Carpet(s)

This past weekend was the Toronto International Film Festival and I was so moved by the celeb appearances (read: there’s not much else going on this week…blog-wise) I decided to collect the looks for a best and worst dressed. Kudos to the ladies because the good news is there were much more best looks than worst. This gives me much hope for awards season.

WORST:

alia-shawkat

This outfit is atrocious in all forms of the word.

dakota-johnson-290

I would be surprised if Dakota wore an outfit that didn’t make me want to upchuck fifty shades of vomit.

drew-barrymore-290

Drew coming up Granny on this one.

naomi-watts

Cake topper Naomi Watts

rachelweisz

WHAT HAPPENED. Did the seamstress sew togets a bunch of scraps?

BEST:

jake

Starting out with the only male worthy of my list. Yum.

TORONTO, ON - SEPTEMBER 11: Actress Sandra Bullock arrives to the

Sandy B bringing the bangs back!

rachel-mcadams-290

My #2 girl crush looking like an angel goddess.

elizabeth-olsen-2-290

Who would’ve thought the littlest Olsen would end up the most normal? Speaking of, what’s Trent been up to…have they sold him yet?

amber-heard-290

It’s rare that Amber Heard isn’t wearing something edgy, she wears fairy princess well.

emily-blunt-290

Spicy neon shoes.

julianne-moore

A cute frock for Julianne.

kate-mara

Grow out the buzz cut and this would be top notch.

naomi-watts-2

Naomi redeemed her earlier cupcake number.

mischa-barton

Never in a million years thought Mischa Barton would look pulled together enough for a best dressed but it looks like time has healed her sloppiness. Well…almost, the dress looks gr8, hair could use a brush.

imogen-poots

Imogen could double as a mime but she looks cute so whatevz.

natalie-portman

Fall florals on Natalie Portman who clearly never ages.

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Red Carpet

VMA’s Red Carpet

The awards show that brought us Lady Gaga’s meat dress obviously is held in high regard in the fashion industry. JK this show is always a trainwreck and it’s difficult to find a best dressed anywhere near the VMA’s but I did my best…just like it took Miley all of five minutes to do her best to force my dinner back up my throat.

WORST:

Screen Shot 2015-08-30 at 8.46.37 PM

The day that I put Nicki on a best dressed list will probably be when hell freezes over.

EM-RATA

I don’t even know what to make of this outfit. It’s like pirate meets salsa dancer meets hooker.

mariska-hargitay

WITCH!

serayah

Fringe splosion. Not a good look.

 jillianmichaels

Jillian Michaels brings us back to 1993. Also we get it, you have abs.

KARLIE-KLOSS

Bad Blood squad not faring well on the Ju…Color and style of this dress are blah.

kelly-osbourne

I don’t understand how Kelly did Fashion Police for so long and continued to dress like a dumpster.

TAYLOR-SWIFT

C’mon Tay. Act like you’ve owned the VMA’s red carpet before. This outfit is blinding, the hair is too slicked and it looks like she can’t keep her eyes open with that cat eye overload.

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The safari twins going for matchy matchy neutrals.

HAILEE

Too many aggressive styles at once on this jumpsuit.

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Britney. We talked about this. Please cover yourself. It’s getting embarrassing.

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Justin, your hair, WOOF.

mileycyrus

Obviously. We can go ahead and book every look of the night for Miley under WORST.

BEST:

CHRISSY-TEIGEN Screen Shot 2015-08-30 at 9.18.25 PM

Elegantly slutty is what I call this look. Also John with the leather pants? DAMN.

jojo

GET OUT RIGHT NOW, it’s the end of baby JoJo.

torikelly

One of my favorite looks of the night. Tori’s crushing the going out party shorts

 gigi-hadid-mtv-vmas-2015-video-music-awards

I don’t think it’s possible for Gigi to look bad.

greer-grammer

Summer’s not over yet with this hot pink!

demi-lovato

This dress normally wouldn’t be for me but Demi is rocking it

 SELENA-GOMEZ

Selena says I’m classy AF with the black gown but also I’m not wearing a bra with the nips peek.

CARA-D

Nothing weird here, keep up the good work Cara.

vanessa-hudgens-290

I can appreciate the hippie chic on Vanessa.

nick-jonas-290

SIIICK Loutfit from Nicky J.

And for all the squad shippers…of course Tay did the red carpet with the Bad Blood crew:

 badbloodsquad

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