Anytime we’ve got a carpet with celebrities stuntin their looks, I immediately transform into Joan Rivers to judge those looks. Please know that I have absolutely no fashion expertise, I just love awards szn the most.
Oscars Red Carpet 2023
We’ve arrived at the big one, that means spring is just around the corner! F that groundhog looking for his damn shadow, all we need is a 7 hour stuffy as hell broadcast with a bunch of A-list actors and a host making PC jokes to know the long winter is almost over. Unfortunately when…
SAG Awards Red Carpet 2023
We are in the future! How many years did I biiitch about the fact that awards shows (and basic cable) should be available to all?! Cut to 2023 when the SAG’s (arguably one of the least watched awards shows as it used to air on TBS) was streamed on YouTube via the Netflix channel. The…
Grammys Red Carpet 2023
Welcome back! I feel like it’s important to really emphasize my fashion expertise. I’ve found that my red carpet blogs sometimes get looks from strangers who think they’ve just stumbled upon a lovely roundup of what the celebs wore and instead they’re treated to Joan Rivers reaching up from beyond the grave to punch you…
Golden Globes Red Carpet 2023
I gotta be completely honest, when the host, Jerrod Carmichael, got on stage and was like obviously last year’s Golden Globes were cancelled because the Hollywood Foreign Press Association is racist as hell and I’m here because I’m black…I was genuinely shocked to hear this information. Not the racism part, the cancellation part. It’s only…
AMA’s Red Carpet 2022
Gonna keep it real witchu, I thought FOR SURE these awards would have a Taylor performance or at the very least, appearance, and that is exclusively why I tuned in. I had to wait about an hour to even set my peepers on her when she won for Red (Taylor’s Version) and I rubbed my…
CMA’s Red Carpet 2022
HEY Y’ALL! We’re getting back into the groove of awards season, gearing up for a long winter of yours truly clothed in oversized sherpa-lined men’s flannels adorned with crumbs asking celebrities if they dared to look in a mirror before they left their mansion to walk this red carpet. An age-old tradish. If I may…
Emmys 2022
I gotta be honest I didn’t know the Emmys were last night until I did my typical dinner-time IG scroll and saw red carpet looks. I’m embarrassed to admit that but I like to always keep it real here and the truth is I think I’m getting too old for this shit?! These days Taylor…
Met Gala Red Carpet 2022
We’re back for another rendition of everything that’s douchey about Hollywood. An elite guest list, a theme, and a red carpet for pretty much no reason. IT’S THE MET BALL, BB’s! And this year we’re sWiTcHiNg things up on The Salty Ju. Instead of doing the classic best and worst dressed list, we’re going to…
CMT Awards Red Carpet 2022
Alas, an awards show with music I’m actually familiar with and don’t feel too old, washed up or uncool to consume! Can always count on the trusty ole CMT Awards to inject the true spirit of Nashville into our veins with a side of sparkles. WORST Honestly this isn’t the worst but I’m putting them…
Grammys Red Carpet 2022
WOWOWOW b2b awards shows what a treat for us all! Unfortunately no one was bitch slapped at this one, but you can’t win em all. If you had bets on how soon the slap was addressed, you CAN win them all because it only took 21 mins for a “stay in your seats” joke. God…
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