Pop Culture, Uncategorized

Celeb-oween 2016

As per tradish, here’s a rundown of all the celeb costumes I could find — from offensive, to nakedย and everything in between. And of course, the winner of this year’s “accidentally racist” costume that they immediately needed to issue an apology for is…….

Casamigos Tequila Halloween Party

YIKES. Outta left field with that one! Didn’t expect sweet ole Hil (who dressed as a basic bitch black cat last year) to fall for this trap.

Also to be clear, every gossip site who described her getup as a “sexy pilgrim” costume should also be issuing apologies because there is nothing sexy about a pilgrim.

Miss Piggy & Kermit. My OG @allymaki

A post shared by Colton Haynes (@coltonlhaynes) on

Colton Haynes has been creepin up on Heidi Klum as Halloween extraordinare but enough is enough. I understand that Miss Piggy as a character is a slutty pig, but that doesn’t mean we need to see her naked, playboy style. TOO FAR, COLTON.

Ok last one I promise ๐Ÿฆ„๐Ÿฆ„๐Ÿฆ„๐Ÿฆ„

A post shared by Jenna Dewan Tatum (@jennadewan) on

This year’s unicorn costume SLAAAYYYYY.

Happy Halloween from Siegfried & Roy ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฏ

A post shared by Nicole Richie (@nicolerichie) on

Enough time has passed since the incident for this to be ok. Hil, take notes. Getting mauled by a tiger? Give it some time and then ease back into it. Native Americans, on the other hand? Always a no.

No clue what this is supposed to be.

Hey what’re you dressed as tonight? Fairy Queen of the Swamp.

Tinkerbell is a spunky one โœจ๐Ÿ’ซโœจ

A post shared by Candace Cameron Bure (@candacecbure) on

What a perfect costume for CCB. Prayers to whoever is rocking those giant feet next to her.

Last night we morphed into a country band. #yugecountryguys

A post shared by Kaitlyn Bristowe (@kaitlynbristowe) on

My fave couple killing it power ranger style.

About last night ๐Ÿค˜๐Ÿป#CasamigosHalloween

A post shared by Cindy Crawford (@cindycrawford) on

Fam Goalz.

Jellybean reload for Tum Tum #FirstWeFeastThenWeFelony #3Ninjas

A post shared by Glen Powell (@glenpowell) on

Creep like a Ninja

A post shared by Glen Powell (@glenpowell) on

Glen Powell, better known as Chad Radwell with my favorite costume of the year. HI-YAHHHH.

Always a good time to throw it back to Alfalfa.

Whoa.

Scott rides again Resist him if you dare

A post shared by Scout laRue Willis (@scoutlaruewillis) on

WTF IS THIS?! I’ve never wanted to unsee something more.

have you ever seen a more "why me?" face ๐Ÿ˜ญ

A post shared by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) on

Needs more flair

A post shared by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) on

Baby Luna CRUSHED Halloween. See Chrissy’s insta for no less than 1000 pictures of the little nugget modeling different costumes.

Speaking of nuggets, here’s ole smooth moves over here as Marty McFly.

๐Ÿ“ฝ๐ŸŽžHooray for Halloween!๐ŸŽž๐Ÿ“ฝ#Marilyn #Groucho #Chaplin #JamesDean @dbelicious

A post shared by Neil Patrick Harris (@nph) on

As always, winners of the fam costume.

 

ariel-winter3

And so we begin the “friendly” portion of Halloween. Playboy bunny from someone who I wouldn’t be surprised to see a sex tape from in 2017.

bellathorne

You know how cowgirls love to wear their lingerie with a bedazzled belt over it.

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I’m not following on this number for Julianne Hough.

SHE WORE THIS WITH HER CHILDREN. THEY ARE OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW HOW RIDICULOUS THIS IS.

xtina

I’m torn here. This is so spot on but like also tone it down with the skankwad costumes every year, girl.

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Thanks for showing us your nips.

tara-reid

Ah yes, of course. “Santa”. If Santa had never seen a cookie in his life and also wore sparkly hot pants.

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It felt right to follow up the sexy anything segment of this blog with Mindy’s Cap Sully costume. Which of course, is the opposite of sexy.

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BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!

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Bey & Blue in an ode to Salt n Pepa

Celebrities attend Kate Hudsons annual Halloween Party in Los Angeles

Katy Perry upgrading from the time she dressed as a literal cheeto, to full-on Hil. Not sure why Orlando Bloom is Trump instead of Slick Willy. Pretty weird coups costume dynamic.

Casamigos Tequila Halloween Party

LC Queen of DIY Halloween with another banger.

"Matthew Morrison hosts his 7th Annual Halloween-Birthday Party Presented by Freixenet Cava and Podwall Entertainment at Hyde, Los Angeles"

Nina Dobrev’s “I’m a complete dope” face really completes this costume.

Casamigos Tequila Halloween Party

Real life Ryan Lochte went for terrifying this year.

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Is this a real rabbit because it is creepy AF.

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Zach Braff looks like a babe soda

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Stranger Things from Amy & her hot boyf. Truth bomb, that hairstyle doesn’t look unrealistic with Amy’s face.

kellyripa

Only time will tell if everyone gets outraged at Kelly for dressing up as Beyonce. Seems like a touchy subject lately. Cough cough, Amy Schumer.

gma

Hard pass to Michael Strahan as Pikachu.

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Well this is, interesting.

leo

LEO! WHY COVER THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE OF YOURS?!

carsondaly

Nothin’ quite like dressing up as your younger self and realizing how old you are.

demi-nick

Demi looks like a dime.

today-halloween-2016

Today Show tackled the 90’s, which of course I approve.

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Is this the first year Matt has dressed as a male character?

pup

Even the Today Show pup is killin it.

tamron

Seems a little early in the morning for a hooker costume, but whatevs.

roker

Did I doooooo thaaaaaattt?

regkathieleehoda

I cannot and will not stop laughing at Kathie’s Reg face.

bush

Jenna Bush mailing it in and “dressing up” as her Grandma.

ellen-degeneres

Ellen and a very low key Heidi Klum as Sia and Maddie.ย Tough look to have multiple Sia’s in the daytime TV world.

theview

I already posted a solo shot of Candace as Tink, but it’s necessary to look at the whole cast of The View. Did they not learn ANYTHING from Today Show’s abomination of Peanuts last year? CARTOONS DON’T WORK IRL. This is what nightmares are made of.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN.

End of the day update (since I guess people actually dress up ON Halloween…whatever.)

Let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel. #HappyHalloween

A post shared by Shawn Booth (@shawn_booth18) on

WAY better than the power rangers. Cause, Doodle.

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We get it, Mario. You’re ripped.

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Enough with the Trolls. The movie isn’t even out yet and JT’s been hawking it since May. Also, those feet.

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Saw a lot of Lochte but didn’t see any Phelps face and I ‘preciate this. Gabby on the other hand is SO four years ago.

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It’s not fair.

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Do better Tay. I mean, I get that you’re bragging that you know Ryan Reynolds by wearing the actual costume, but also the squad can do better than a bunch of basic costumes. Especially when you’re all rich AF.

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Channing COULD NEVER be the beast.

A post shared by Beyoncรฉ (@beyonce) on

Barbie dreams come true. But that second Insta Blue is CLEARLY like ok enough pics let’s go get some G-D candy now.

And for the big reveal…Heidi Klum’s infamous costume this year that she built up for FAR TOO LONG is

Taking a page out of Kimmy K’s book from last year, Heidi dressed up as herself then took it one step further and dressed up 5 other women like herself, complete with face prosthetics. Kewl.

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JUice

Weekly JUice

Week of 8/8/16

1. Dance Goals.

We had to. #stepup10years

A post shared by Jenna Dewan Tatum (@jennadewan) on

Step Up is a top five dance movie that made us all believe that we will fall in love with a hunky piece of meat who can toss us around on the dance floor because Jenna and Channing got married. Well they’re keeping the dream alive by recreating the OG Step Up move 10 years later. I don’t ever want to imagine a life where these two don’t dance together every night. First with Lip Sync Battle, now with this, I’ll be disappointed if this isn’t a daily ritual.

2. Phelps wins 1 billion gold medals.

michael-phelps-face-435

Michael Phelps is like 100 and still blowing everyone out of the water (PUN INTENDED.) He may have become an internet meme for a hot second, but then he was hey Twitter, suck on my 22 Gold medals, BETCH. This is my sports coverage for the week…a picture of Phelps in da zone aka smelling a fart. It’s probably the best you’re gonna get unless you’d like my unfiltered opinions on Ryan “Jeah” Lochte’s hair (it’s dumb) and THE FINAL FIVE (they have eternal wedgies that make me tug at my own underwear as if I too have a leotard stuffed up my buhhole.) And THAT’s my Olympics coverage. GET ON MY LEVEL, BOB COSTA!

3. NSYNC reunites to remind us they’re old AF.

JC's 40th… And, if you don't know now you know…

A post shared by Justin Timberlake (@justintimberlake) on

I would give my left nip for a full-on N*SYNC reunion and this is what they think will satisfy us? A picture that Lance probably had to photobomb because he wasn’t asked to be in it, at JC’s 40th birthday party. FORTY. HOLY COW. Be older, JC. You can’t. Seriously if there can be a tour of Ryan Cabrera and O*Town this summer, then N*SYNC can hit the stage again. I don’t care if it’s half-assed, I mean you could literally start a Vegas residency just for “dancing” like Britney does, as long as you deliver the top N*SYNC hits, I’ll be there with bells on. What I realize now that I’ve typed this out is that I’d probably be fine with just like a bar playing N*SYNC’s discography on a Saturday night. But until then, we’ll always have this pic. Stay golden, JT.

4. Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry show us the goods.ย A week ago Orlando Bloom let it all hang for a casual paddle boarding adventure in Italy. I didn’t do the JUice last week, but if I did, I probably would’ve included the pic, mostly because it took me about 30 seconds to find the uncensored version and text it to everyone I know. Hey how’s it going? Here’s Orlando Bloom’s impressive D and droolworthy body. Obviously there was no reason for him to be ass naked when Katy Perry was fully clothed, other than the fact that he’s attractive and famous and he can. When in Rome (Sardinia) do as the Romans (Sardinians) do and take your dick out for vacation, I guess. ICYMI, here’s the censored version (that shadow though…) Since I don’t condone porning up my website you can turn to twitter for the full monty. Or my cell phone photos…

orlando-bloom-katy-perry

Anyway, this week, Katy Perry was like hey I’ve got a set of tits that everyone probably wants to see, and she was probz feeling upstaged by the amount of attention her boyf’s little nudey row was getting, so she decided to spice it up for a pic. By showing her buttcheek. Really, girl? That’s all you got? STEP IT UP.

I know it's a little cheeky, butt… Cycling in The ile de re, France ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ท

A post shared by KATY PERRY (@katyperry) on

ย 5. JRodg pretending to be famous.

Hey guys, now that they can talk about it, JoJo and Jord are going to vomit their love all over social media. This includes the most awkward hover arm picture of Jordan and his “good Nashville buddy” Brett. No seriously, they’re really tight. Also JoJo looks like a smokeshow and I’m obviously bitter about it.

Couple of Nashville buds sweating our butts off in Dallas, at least @joelle_fletcher looks ๐Ÿ”ฅ #budlightparty

A post shared by Jordan Rodgers (@jrodgers11) on

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