Music, Playlist

Lady Jams Playlist

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This is one of those collections of songs that could possibly be embarrassing to jam to, and are also mostly one-hit wonders…but most importantly, when the CD-R was invented, you bet your bottom dollar these were some of the first songs I burned to a mix, tossed into my karaoke player and bumped. One thing they all have in common is that they’re lady singers. So pour a glass of pinot grig, put on your yoga pants and feel all the feels with this gurl pop throwback playlist. #BOYSSTINK

1. I Wanna Be Bad- Willa Ford. I always believe in starting off a mix with a hard bang and I think we can all agree Willa Ford, certified badgurl does just that. Never to be heard from again after the TRL days, I’m assuming good ole Willa and her boy Royce did some jail time cause they’re BaD 2 tha BONE. PS my sister had a friend who claimed Willa Ford was her babysitter and used to steal blueberries from their fridge. #BadGirlLyfe

2. Everything- M2M. These two hail from Norway and America welcomed them with wide open arms. Their jams were so hot one of them even ended up in a Pokemon movie. This particular number was performed on Dawson’s Creek’s spring break episode. If it’s good enough for Pacey, it’s good enough for me.

3. Stuck- Stacie Orrico. Oh how I miss Stacy with an “ie”. This was a sassy boy troubles song and to be honest I don’t think our girl Stace ever came out with anything else. Go out on top, that’s what I always like to say. Correction: She also sang “There’s Gotta Be More To Life” which is also a top hit. 

4. All the Things She Said- t.A.T.u. I guess we were all SUPER diverse with our music duos in the 2000’s because this is a Russian group—I had to look that up because all I remembered about terribly named t.A.T.u was that they were lesbians. Not even sure if that’s a rumor…but they did smooch in the video which was REAL scandalous.

5. Breathe (2 AM)- Anna Nalick. If you didn’t memorize every single word to this song when it came out I don’t want to know you as a person. It’s kind of a downer, but I couldn’t make an all girl tribute from the 2000’s and not include Anna. So this will be the part of the playlist where you think about what you’ve done, and JUST BREATHE. PS immature Julia laughed at “naked in front of the crowd” every time. Sorry not sorry.

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6. 4ever- The Veronicas. The Veronicas were a couple of BA’s. Realistically I don’t know anything about them but both of their hits banged real hard. In fact, I still use the intro to “Untouched” as an alarm sometimes when I want to wake up terrified and disoriented. As you might recall, this number scored the infamous carnival scene from She’s the Man where Amanda Bynes switches from girl to boy faster than you can pull popcorn out of your cleavage.

7. Gotta Tell You- Samantha Mumba. Samantha is Irish?! I tell ya, learn something new everyday. Anyway, Gotta Tell You is a great dance number if say, you wanted to invite 10 of your closest gal pals over for a slumber and choreograph an intricate dance like you’re all Wade Robson.

8. Rush- Aly&AJ. Wouldn’t be a Salty Ju mix unless I snuck a little Disney love into play. Were they pretty queer in their DCOM’s? Obviously. But is this song a hot rock number for two Disney blondes? Absolutely.

9. Ordinary Day- Vanessa Carlton. Threw you a curveball here. Everyone and their mother knows that A Thousand Miles is the anthem of the 2000’s. I decided to switch it up with an underdog from our favorite piano-playin gal. She sings about falling in love in a dream or something? Who cares when you’re wailing at the top of your lungs in a solo car concert with Ness. If only I also had a piano in my car…

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10. Take Me Away- FeFe Dobson. In my 13th year, I went through a really hardcore punk phase. It was the days of Ashlee Simpson and Avril and FeFe. Feef’s was my girl because she wore wife-beaters and studded belts and rocked hard. I purchased her CD with my hard-earned money and I’m not ashamed to admit I unearthed it recently and remembered every word. She even has a creepy song called Julia, so we’re basically BFFs.

11. What Do You Do- The Troys. This probably also could’ve gone on my 8th grade angst playlist but I forgot about these bada$$e$ so here we are.

12. Love Song- Sara Bareilles. Sara is still crushing it present day, but no one will ever forget her debut piano jam that set a precedent for independent woman all ova! Also this is another ideal song for exercising your vocal range at a slower pace.

13. Dumb Girls- Lucy Woodward. A catchy one-hit wonder for Lucy also happens to be REAL cheesy. At least she tries to be a rebel with, “I look at the ground and give the sky the middle finger.” YEAH YOU FLICK THAT SKY OFF.

14. It’s About Time- Lillix. I actually forgot about Lillix for a minute until last weekend when my sister’s ipod shuffle brought it back (among The Click Five…yikes) but I’m glad they came back into my life just before I made this playlist. Pretty sure I had their CD too, because I had an eclectic taste in music, obviously.

15. Everywhere- Michelle Branch. The millennium didn’t have music if it wasn’t for the dynamic duo of Michelle and Vanessa. Their piano-slammin hits about boys completed me. Michelle had a leg up over Vanessa with weird pronunciations of words though so I’d like to thank her for the pure joy I get from singing “turn it inside out so I can seee-UH.”

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16. Why Not- Hilary Duff. Heard this classic at a pre-game a couple weeks ago and had the unfortunate realization that I once thought it was VERY cool to put the lyric “You always dress in yellow, when you wanna dress in GOLD” in my AIM profile and highlight the font in yellow. Yikes, Julia. Regardless of how stupid the lyrics are to this song, it’s still a classic. How else would you know how to get to heaven… or even to L.A.?

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17. Somebody- Bonnie McKee. One last mellow cry before we end this mix with a bang. Apparently Bonnie is making dance pop hits now but let’s never forget the time when she was wah-wahing about how single she was. At my very first parent-less concert (Ryan Cabrera), she opened and I got to meet her. Pretty sure I was the asshole who was like I don’t even know this chick and thus I don’t care but what a great ballad this is for crying into your wine. Just me? Nevermind.

18. Leave (Get Out)- JoJo. Not only does this song slay but it has a message, and that message is LEAVE because my mix is over and our time together is done. No seriously, GET OUUUUUUUUTTTTT!!!! PS how impressive is it that a thirteen year old wailed that note?

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Music, Playlist

90’s Pop Jamz

It’s been a while since I’ve forced everyone to listen to the best songs of previous decades so here we are again. This time it’s the OBVIOUS pop bangers of the 90’s and early 2000’s focusing on boy bands and girl bands who were the stuff (with the additional bada$$ bitches who were solo.)

1. Bye, Bye, Bye- N*SYNC. I mean obviously this playlist needs to start with the OG of boy bands, the pinnacle, if you will. Though difficult to pick just one N*SYNC classic, this one came with it’s own dance move and therefore has stood the test of time.

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2. Oops!…I Did It Again- Britney Spears. Because back then there wasn’t a Justin without a Britney. The best kind of song is one that starts with what sounds like a car attempting and failing to start and has a break in the middle for a quick Broadway play…Aww, you shouldn’t have. No really Brit, you shouldn’t have. Mid-song talkies are the worst. But this song isn’t.

3. MMMBop- Hanson. Three young boys with floor length blonde locks sing a song that we LITERALLY will never know the words to. Seriously, WHAT ARE THEY ACTUALLY SAYING? Whatever, it’s catchy AF.

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4. Waterfalls- TLC. This song is about people dying of AIDS and drug overdoses and stuff, pretty heavy, but if you use a metaphor about bodies of water to describe it, suddenly it’s a fresh song with a little sax thrown in. If you can master the Left Eye (may she rest in peace) rap in this then I absolutely need to be your friend.

5. Back Here- BBMak. It’s unfortunate that these guys came out around the same time as N*SYNC and BSB cause they pretty much didn’t stand a chance. They also had the hairstyles of a punk rock band so that was strike 2. Good news is they know how to write a killer whiny love song.

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6. Genie In A Bottle- Christina Aguilera. We’ve seen a lot of Christina’s in our lifetime, Dirrty Xtina wearing assless chaps, retro Christina trying to make the 50’s cool and more recently The Voice Christina trying to be a part of the boys club. It’s important for us not to forget that she got her start being suuuuper innocent singing about getting rubbed the right way. Get it, girl!

7. When The Lights Go Out- 5ive. Damn this boy band had a little FLAVA. And I’m not just talking about how clever it was that they literally used the number 5 in their band name. I’m referring to the swagger they had in this song. SECOND VERSE, GIRL-The rapping is on point. They’re bragging about their bedroom skills and I for one couldn’t wait for them to show me what it’s all about. Not so much after this picture though…

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8. No More (Baby I’ma Do Right)- 3LW. If you don’t listen to this song and immediately burst out laughing to “broken promithes, promithes” you don’t like fun things. 3LW may have had a little street cred as a girl band and telling off their deadbeat men, but THAT LISP. Also they really drive the point home in this song by repeating every word, just in case. Fun fact: I saw them open for N*SYNC and they came out in janitor jumpsuits and stripped them off mid song while dancing and it was suuuupes impressive. It obviously didn’t take a lot for me to be dazzled at that age.

9. Give Me Just One Night- 98 Degrees. We’re going to sweep it under the rug that 98 degrees tried to make a comeback with a song about blowies and really relish the good ole days where all they needed was one night (one night) with a girl. Not for nothing but this song was educational in teaching me my first Spanish words.

10. Wannabe- Spice Girls. The Spice Girls created the girl group and also taught us about Brits. I used to reenact scenes from the Spice Girl movie during recess, unfortunately everyone’s favorite was Baby and BECAUSE I WAS BORN WITH BROWN HAIR I had to be Posh or Sporty. Both options suck and so did my British accent but I digress. Here’s another song where I have heard it 1000 times and still don’t know what they’re saying, but I certainly know that Bevin, Peyton Brooke and Haley did a choreographed dance to it on the roof of a house party. PS Scary Spice’s cackle is EXACTLY how she got her name.

11. The Animal Song- Savage Garden. Let’s slow it down now with two baby faces with the falsetto of angels. This song is about how they wish they were animals because then they could run around all carefree. Don’t we all wish that, Savage Garden, don’t we all. Anyway their CD (I’m pretty sure they only have one?) is the best crying soundtrack you could ever ask for. Trust me. Plus: pwetty boys.

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12. S Club Party- S Club 7. Again, here we are with another classssic British band that taught me new things. For example, I learned that hoochie mamas show their nana’s at any good party. For the record, if their show was still on the air I would still be watching it because it was the shit. Unfortunately S Club 7 pretty much fell off the wagon and tried to do a comeback recently that was quite a scene. Jo no longer has the flow, let’s just say that.

13. Summergirls- LFO. LFO was the badass version of boy bands. They mused nonsense about Scooby snacks and Chinese food and we were like yes, please, Rich.

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14. Candy- Mandy Moore. Again, might be hard to recall a time when Mandy was REAL blonde and singing about craving a boy like she craves candy. Suuuch a stupid song but doesn’t make it any less catchy. Love always, Mandy.

15. Liquid Dreams- O-Town. The original Making the Band kicked off reality TV AND gave us a song about wet dreams. Could we really ask for more? It concerns me to report that my sister and I spent a whole summer day on my back deck choregraphing a dance to this song and not once did my mom say hey maybe stop shimmying to a song about boner jams. It was a great dance though.

16. C’est La Vie- B*Witched. It’s pretty much a rule at this point that if you have an asterick in your band name your cool factor is top notch. These chicks are also suuuupes Irish, which pushes their cool factor through the roof. You don’t get too many pop songs that you could literally do an irish jig in the middle to some bag pipes and that’s what makes this song gr8. Plus it starts with “Some people say I look like me dad”…which doesn’t even make sense.

17. Aaron’s Party (Come Get It)- Aaron Carter. I refuse to ever make a 90’s pop playlist without my gangsta AC. Kid was like 4 ft. tall wearing oversized FUBU with white Nikes and apparently knew how to threw a kiiiickin party while his parents catch a matinee. The different characters in this song, the way he’s talking to the honey’s and breakin it down on the living room dance floor instead of being a good host, and his dad grounding him at the end…what a whirlwind of emotions in one song. Was it the party of the month? No. It was the party of the year.

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18. He Loves U Not- Dream. Although I’m pretty sure I never knew anyone’s individual names in Dream, I know that I loved them. They were super sassy. I had(have) their CD and one of their songs was literally them just telling off a guy named Jordan for trying to date them all at once and thinking they wouldn’t find out. THEY FOUND OUT, JORDAN. I made my very first music video (camcorder style) to this song and it was award-winning if I do say so myself. It was supposed to be a dream sequence (get it?) then during the instrumentals we ran around and pulled the letters “D-R-E-A-M” off the wall to show we were going back to real life. Whoa. Copywritten so don’t even try to rip me off, guys.

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Signature Pink Coordinates ❤

19. The Hardest Part of Breaking Up- 2Gether. These clowns were supposed to be a parody of a boy band but their mockery went over our tween idiot heads and we loved them anyway. Also they had a balding 40 year old in the group, casj. AND they rapped about math. WHAT a breakup jam this is though. These bros could get DOWN and they also would like their cat back pls.

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20. I Want It That Way- Backstreet Boys. It seemed like the right thing to do to bookend this playlist with the two rivals and most popular boy bands of the 90’s. Now don’t get me wrong, I was 1000% team N*SYNC, but that never clouded my appreciation for what BSB was doing. Unfortunately a lot of the teens at this time did let it cloud their vision. My dad’s favorite thing to do (his only entertainment really) when he took us to an N*SYNC concert was to ask tweens if this was the BSB concert and just watch their dramats reactions. I would imagine it’s close to going to a 1D concert today and announcing that you can’t wait to see 5 Seconds of Summer? (1D still a touchy subject?) I don’t know. Either way this song gives me all the feels, and I DON’T WANNA HEAR YOU SAAAYYYY it doesn’t.

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Music, Playlist

8th Grade Angst Playlist

Here’s a mix for when you want to remember what it’s like to have so many emotions at once, shout YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND ME, slam your door and put up a dramatic away message on AIM. Or if you wanna pair one of your dad’s ties with a wife beater, stack on your rubber glitter bracelets from Claire’s and pose like a badass in front of your Beanie Baby collection and Tiger Beat posters.

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Either way, either way’s fine.

1. Dance, Dance- Fall Out Boy. Oh Pete Wentz, you and your guyliner and cool hats and dating Peyton Sawyer long distance…FOB was soooooo cool and the titles of their songs were so BA, i.e. “Our Lawyers Made Us Change The Name of This Song…” that it’s very clear why they made this playlist.

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AIM Buddy Profile Lyric: “Why don’t you show me a little bit of spine, You’ve been saving for his mattress, love” For when the girl whose already wearing thongs stole your boyfriend. SLUT.

2. You’re So Last Summer-Taking Back Sunday. I mean, obviously. There was definitely a time in my life where every single one of these lyrics found a place in an away message or profile of mine, so it’s good to know I was never dramats or anything. (ex: The truth is you could slit my throat and with my one last gasping breath, I’d apologize for bleeding on your shirt.) Yiiikes. Also saw Taking Back Sunday in concert at the NYS fair and it was preeetttyy great. All the feels, live.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “Boys like you are a dime a dozen.” For the boy you’re planning a marriage to who clearly doesn’t like you. WELL YOU KNOW WHAT YOU’RE A DIME A DOZEN. SO HA.

3. Pieces of Me- Ashlee Simpson. Ash was obviously the sister of Christian pop princess, Jessica Simpson…but Ashlee was so mizundastooood and so she dyed her hair black and wore men’s camo pants and converse sneaks. Punk girlz, YEAH. Girl was my idol. I watched her reality show and saw her strain her raspy voice and talk about how she’s been living in Jess’s shadow and I was like YEAH TOTALLY I FEEL YA. And then she dated the preppiest porcupine in California, Ryan Cabrera, and I loved her even more. She holds a special place in my rebellious (read: not rebellious) middle school years that will never be replaced.

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AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “It’s as if you know me better than I ever knew myself.” First relationship ❤

4. Boulevard of Broken Dreams-Green Day. Green Day gave us our 8th grade graduation song, you know where they sang about everything being unpredictable and having the time of our lives, and we were all like actually we’re 12 and we’re all just going to high school together, soooo.. But anyway, they were badasses who cursed the government and got real hardcore about actual world issues and it all went straight over my head as I used “Wake Me Up When September Ends” as an away message on the first day of school. Seriously, I thought that was so kewl. This song is pretty angsty, aka it fits in perfectly on this mix.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me ‘Til then I walk alone.” When Ashley has a big sleepover and doesn’t invite you.

5. The Middle- Jimmy Eat World. It took me probably my whole life so far to figure out what Jimmy Eat World is singing in this song, but I DO know that they’re saying everything will be alright. So this is for when you’ve listened to the last song and you’re crying about having no friends or something and you need to know that there won’t always be bitches who exclude you from the lunch table.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “Live right now Just be yourself.” Do you, grl.

6. All Hail the Heartbreaker- The Spill Canvas. This song is one of many that is currently making me wonder how I didn’t think half of these bands were a bunch of wieners. Like why are you so whiny about girls not liking you? Little role reversal action, the emo guy who had his heart ripped to shreds is apparently who we all loved in the 8th grade.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “I’ll let you get the best of me, Because there’s nothing else that I do well.” You and Justin broke up…AGAIN.

7. Dirty Little Secret- All American Rejects. The lead singer of this band was a real hottie. I think he did an episode of Room Raiders with Stephen from Laguna and my pre-teen heart exploded. Anyway, all around banger of a song and about a secret love affair, so spicy.

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AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “I go around a time or two, Just to waste my time with you.” This lyric is just ambiguous enough that it also could apply to a BFF, because what did you do with your BFF in middle school that WASN’T wasting time?

8. Middle of Nowhere-Hot Hot Heat. Peyton Sawyer liked this song and she was so hardcore punk rock and wore converses and stuff so you know it’s a great one. Plus it was on her Friends with Benefit CD for her dying mom. Nuff said.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “She said, “Maybe there’s a bit of me waiting for a bit of you. baby.” I absolutely used this in my profile. Just waiting for my pre-teen prince, duh.

9. Helena-My Chemical Romance. This band has a scary name and a lead singer that’s pretty terrifying because he really subscribed to the white face, dark makeup, dark greasy hair thing. Yet for whatever reason, I loved the shit out of them in my younger years. This was one of my favorites and I distinctly remember the music video because a dead girl gets out of the coffin and starts doing ballet at her own funeral. No biggie.

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AIM Prof Lyric: “And what’s the worst to take, From every heart you break.” This is the least creepy lyric in this song, you’re welcome.

10. Space- Something Corporate. My obsession with SoCo might’ve started in middle school, but my love affair with lead singer Andrew McMahon continues today because I see him in concert 1-2 times a year. He’s the stuff. That man knows how to wail on a piano. What I REALLY wanted to do was put Konstantine on here because it’s probably the greatest song ever made (bold statement, whatever) but it’s definitely not a casual song to throw into a mix, you’ve gotta be ready for all the Konfusion. This song is definitely more fitting and still great, because all of his songs are great, duh. Ok I’ll stop slobbering all over him now. Actually, I won’t because this happened this summer and I’m still not over it:

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: Side note-not his best song for lyrics unfortunately…”and you say, that you can, when you know that you won’t.”

11. Hands Down-Dashboard Confessional. Ah how we all imagined our first kiss would be, gazing at the stars in the grass with a guy whose probably wearing skinny jeans but is like reeeallyyy into you. Did anyone have one of those? Pls advise. Dashboard was so romants and dramats all at once with this number but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Seriously, girl…kiss him before he dies.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “My heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury, or wear as jewelery, which ever you prefer.” The I’m obsessed with you portion of your prof. Usually accompanied by some initials.

12. Best of Me- The Starting Line. Long distance love + being young foreva=the perfect song to mosh to. Who knew?

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “we got older but we’re still young, we never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up.” Class of ’09 GTS GMS LOLOLOL You know WHO YOU ARE!!

13. Pretty Girl (The Way)- Sugarcult. I’m like 98% sure this song was used in Laguna Beach when Stephen decided for the millionth time that he didn’t want LC as a side piece anymore and was with Kristin rubbing it in her face. So you should probably think about that when you listen to it, but also think about how LC is a bo$$ now so there’s hope for us all.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “and that’s what you get for falling again; you can never get him out of your head.” Damn you, STEEEEvehhhnnn.

14. Hallelujah- Paramore. Hayley Williams is the poster child of punk rock princess, sorry Ashlee, but the girl has bright orange hair so she wins. She’s been shouting about stuff forever, and the best part is that she’s still releasing new stuff and it’s getting air time on pop radio, so she’s pretty much made 8th grade jams mainstream. Respect.

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AIM Prof Lyric: “Let’s make it last forever.” SUMMER VACATION, at the pool with mah betchez.

15. Okay I Believe You But My Tommy Gun Don’t-Brand New. This band was probably the closest I ever got to the scream-o genre and I think it was a good line to draw. I don’t love when a man screeches into a microphone, luckily it’s a quick one in this song. Otherwise they had dirty lyrics that I knew I shouldn’t be listening to and it made them that much cooler. Also this title is pretty terrifying. So there’s that.

AIM Prof Lyric: “Hope you come down with something they can’t diagnose, Don’t have the cure for.” So aggress-for the girl in the gym locker room who told everyone you don’t wear deodorant.

16. What’s My Age Again-Blink 182. Totes one of those songs that is hilarious and fun when you’re 13 and think that 23 is SUUUUUPER far away. Except now that I’m 23 this song sucks. Nonetheless, it’s a great Blink song and is pretty much the epitome of their inapprops lyrics. It was real rebellious of me to be listening to them back in the day.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “I never wanna act my age, What’s my age again?” Realistically I would never use any of these lyrics in my prof in case my parents ever found it and took away AIM from me (once was traumatizing enough.)

17. Addicted-Simple Plan. This band was the poster child of whiny the world is against me lyrics. They sang about feeling left out and abused and unloved and it was great at the time because obviously growing up a privileged white girl it’s like they totally read my mind…but now that I look back I couldn’t in good conscious put one of their depressing songs on this playlist. So I chose this one because even though it’s still everybody hates me and leaves me…it has a play on words with “dick” and that’s entertaining to me. Good work, Pierre. Seriously though Pierre was cute as shit, and a French Canadian…bilingual, so hot.

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AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “I don’t know why I’m still waiting, I can’t make you mine.” For the boy who didn’t want to sign your yearbook.

18. The Anthem- Good Charlotte. Ahhh, GC and the punk rock Madden bros. Did you ever think back then that these two would be tamed by Nicole Richie and Cameron Diaz? Plot twist. This song is about not being held down, but like obviously they really scaled it back since then. At least I hope they did because they bitched about rich and famous people and well…you pretty much married into that, boys.

AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “It’s a new day, but it all feels old.” Ugh, school AGAIN?!

19. Be My Escape- Relient K. These guys may have been punk but they used some pretty large vocab in their lyrics so I think we can all agree they were also educational. Case in point, they used the word complacency in this song. My 13-year-old brain totes had to look that up. Anyway, this one is another needy love song that gave words to all the feels I had for the guy whose locker was near mine and I was probably obsessed with. Aaand now that I’m reading the lyrics this song was about God, so that changes things a beat. Whatever. It’s still a banger.

AIM Prof Lyric: “But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair.” LIFE IS SO UNFAIR.

20. Ocean Avenue-Yellowcard. I shipped Yellowcard REAL hard. Like hard enough to have their concert on DVD and watch it so many times that when it finally was lost or stolen (DOES ANYONE HAVE IT?) I was real affected by it. My dad watched it with me once and saw how halfway through the show they told the crowd to separate down the middle and then run to the other side as hard and fast as they could. Den thought that was a little TOO intense for his 13 year old daughter and therefore wouldn’t let me go to an actual concert of theirs. LAME. They DID say if someone fell to pick them up but WHATEVER. Anyway, I stand by my love for these guys, who else has a violinist in a punk band? It’s cool as shit. Supes cultured. (He used to do back flips off the piano mid-concert too…HARDCORE PARKOUR.)

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AIM Buddy Prof Lyric: “We’re looking up at the same night sky, And keep pretending the sun will not rise, Be together for one more night, Somewhere, somehow.” Star crossed lovers, from different middle schools.

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