Music

Scott Eastwood’s So Tall and Handsome As Hell

When Tay gave us the Blank Space video, it was so over the top that it needed a full blog dedicated to her spectacle of outfit changes. Wildest Dreams deserves it’s own blog because of the perfection that is Scott Eastwood…and also how cocky it is for Taylor Swift to cast this hot piece of ass for a song about a love affair that the guy will never forget. What a minx. Let’s dive in.

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In old timey Africa, Taylor is a dark haired raven. I’m not really into it HOWEVER it’s still better than her hair in the I knew you were trouble video.

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Her hair may be blah but her cat eye, as always is perfection. I can’t decide if I’m more jelly of that or this…

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This is her leading man and it literally baffles me that this is the son of crusty old Clint Eastwood. Until I google young Clint Eastwood and then WHOA. Mind blown.

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Anyway, back to the main event:

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We’re like 5 seconds into the video and they’re already playing tonsil hockey. The true reason why Tay cast Scott for this vid.

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HER FOOT POPPED. IT WAS A FOOT-POPPING KISS.

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Easily her best fashion moment in this video also what’s up, giraffe?

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Cecil? Too soon? R.I.P

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OH HEY scandalous sleeping with your co-star Tay!

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This is getting good now.

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Then it gets bad because Tay goes Blank Space on him for a beat. YIKES.

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Scott uses his strong legs to kick a chair. A little bit of drool falls out of my mouth unexpectedly.

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Quick recovery with a safari flying date. Taylor looks like she smells of mothballs. My nana used to wear that head scarf to Sunday services. Jus sayin.

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Gonna need for them to never cover Scott’s face like this ever again.

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Then he tosses her around like she weighs the same as a newborn baby. Muscles ❤

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Tay admires her million dollar legs with Simba. (Wild animals make her go legs out apparently)

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Then she’s basically naked. No seriously, did she think this outfit would slide under my radar? I see buttcheek.

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More, more, more! What is this The Notebook? (I don’t hate it.) I bet she was like but what if we add a little rain? Wouldn’t that be cool? And then maybe I’ll just mount Scott right during a rainstorm.

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But then the joke’s over because this was all in front of a green screen with some hideous costumes. Khaki trousers will never be flattering, folks.

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Bad boy 4 lyfe Scott smokes inside and thinks about the next co-star he’s going to bang. (Spoiler alert: it’s me.) He’s so bad but he does it so well.

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Suddenly this is a story about a girl named Lucky.

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JK Scott’s actually married to a tramp and Taylor’s all remember when we mated amongst the zebras and lions?

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The final shot. DAMNIT SCOTT, IT’S TOO LATE.

But actually, when does this full length feature film come out? BECAUSE I AM ALL IN.

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Not to deter from the new hotness of loving wild animals but how exactly do music videos make proceeds? Just wondering.

Anyway, all around great video, Tay. Holding out hope there will be more of this in the feature:

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2 thoughts on “Scott Eastwood’s So Tall and Handsome As Hell

  1. Not what I had imagined when I had heard the song.
    Why? Why would she start making such bad videos?
    Her initial videos of You Belong With Me and Love Story are so sweet and romantic and what her songs are. But Blank Space, Shake It Off- they’re rubbish!

    Like

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