Sometimes I like to show you guys that I have range…that I can publish a playlist including a song by The Cheetah Girls and cartoon band from Doug then pull a 180 on you and make a playlist of some 90’s gangster jams. I like to keep you on your toes. Enjoy some OG hip hop tunes this week.
1. Hypnotize- Notorious B.I.G
Obviously it wasn’t 90’s rap without East Coast vs. West Coast and Biggie was the heart attack waiting to happen reppin my region, may he rest in peace. #Gone2Soon
Most Disturbing Flow: “At my arraignment, note for the plantiff, Your daughter’s tied up in a Brooklyn basement (shh), Face it, not guilty, that’s how I stay filthy (not guilty)” Comforting.
2. Jump-Kriss Kross
Switching gears to some young’ns in the biz to show you that sick beats can come from all ages. The Daddy Mac and The Mac Daddy threw on some backwards jerseys and dropped this track that makes me wanna JUMP, JUMP. I have a not so secret obsession with this song and Kriss Kross in general, to the point where my iPhone caught on right quick and started autocorrecting “wig” to “wiggitywiggitywiggitywack” and I didn’t hate it one bit.
Most Disturbing Flow: “I like my stuff knockin’ knockin’, I love it when a girl is like jockin’ jockin'” These two keep it PG. Respect.
3. Still Not A Player- Big Pun
One day I got bored at work, was listening to some throwback beats and made a bulletin board of pictures of dead rappers, a beautiful tribute if you ask me. My boss did not feel the same way and politely asked me to take it down when he saw it. I guess I should include that my boss was my dad and I should probably win the award for worst employee ever but it was a summer job and cutting out pictures of rappers interested me more than windows did. Anyway, Big Pun was front and center on the tribute board because he was large and in charge. RIP BIG PUN, hope you still playin’ up in Heaven, crushin angels left and right.
Most Disturbing Flow: “My my, I’m big huh, I rip my (prick) through your hooters, I’m sick, you couldn’t measure my (dick) with six rulers.” A poet, really.
4. Shoop- Salt-n-Pepa
I think it’s time we had a little bit of lady rapper lovin. This song is dirty but this time the tables have turned, boyz, it’s about women objectifying men. Do it, Pepa!
Most Disturbing Flow: “You’re a shotgun – bang! What’s up with that thang? I wanna know how does it hang?” Well? Are you gonna answer her?
5. Good Vibrations- Marky Mark & The Funky Bunch
He may be a respected actor now but let us never ever forget where Mark Wahlberg got his start, as a rapper from Dorchester, spittin those rhymes. He will probably never bring Marky Mark back and it’s a true shame because there is not one disturbing flow in this song…it’s literally all about dancing and being drug free. Yeah, can you feel it, baby? What a gentlemen’s rapper.
6. Tha Crossroads- Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
Bone and the gang recently made headlines for saving a guy’s life, no biggie. What they should be making headlines for is the music video for Tha Crossroads because it is downright terrifying. Do I understand a word that they’re saying? Of course not..nobody does. Oh, ok according to the lyrics this song is about faith and people dying…who would’ve guessed the gang could be so deep. I guess the music video makes more sense now. I’m gonna go ahead and just keep singing Crossroads, crossroads, crossroads like the ignoramus that I am.
Most Disturbing Flow: “Why they kill my dog and man, I miss my uncle Charles y’all” WTF. DOG KILLERS. Oh yeah and his uncle died too.
7. Are You That Somebody?- Aaliyah
This is the only time in the world I will allow baby sounds to enter my ears because this song is fire flames. RIP Aaliyah…this playlist is getting really crowded with dead people…yiiikes. Anyway, DURTY SOUTH foreva.
Most Disturbing Flow: “Sometimes I’m goody goody, Right now I’m naughty naughty” Just about as tame as Marky Mark and his funky bunch.
8. California Love- 2pac Ft. Dr. Dre, Roger Troutman
Obviously you can’t have East Coast without West Coast and their bandanna wearin’ king (may he rest in the witness protection program). Remember when hologram 2pac was a thing and it was nightmare inducing? I’m kind of glad they didn’t push that further, let’s just remember human form 2pac lovin on the west coast.
Most Disturbing Flow: “Pack a vest for your Jimmy in the city of sex.” LA= STDs…noted.
9. No Diggity- Blackstreet Ft. Dr. Dre, Queen Pen
This song got a nice white basic betch revival via Beca throwing it down riff-off style in Pitch Perfect. Regardless of if it’s performed acapella or OG, it’s the stuff. Can we make No Diggity a thing again? Like, hey you coming to my party? NO DIGGITY. Just a suggestion, think it over and get back to me.
Smoothest Flow: “Curve’s the word, spin’s the verb, Lovers it curves so freak what you heard.” Nailed it.
10. This Is How We Do It- Montell Jordan
PARTAAYYYY JAM. Get down and wave those hands all over the joint! This is kind of how parties were when I was in high school. Just kidding, it wasn’t all good in my hood, we drank Mike’s Hard Lemonade in the basement after our parents went to sleep. But whatever, that’s neither here nor there.
Most Disturbing Flow: “So I reach for my 40 and I turn it up” This made me instantly taste warm 40 in my mouth and almost puke a little. So in that way, it’s disturbing, otherwise, the general rule is “Drink 40’s, get shawties.”
11. Doo Wop (That Thing)- Lauryn Hill
Ya girl Lauryn Hill just trying to do a little justice in the rap game and warn the ladies that some guys just want the V and then they’re outtie. Thanks for this PSA in such catchy tunes, Laur, sometimes we all just need a little truth bomb. COME AGAIN, COME AGAIN.
Smoothest Flow: “Babygirl, respect is just a minimum” PREACH.
12. Just A Friend- Biz Markie
Real talk: this song only made the cut because I laugh out loud every single time Biz Markie blubbers out “I asked her name she said blah-blah-blah.” Names are irrelevant, what IS relevant, is that she had a VERY big bra. Get after it, Biz. Get outta that friend zone. And also maybe never sing again. Thank you.
13. Let Me Clear My Throat- DJ Kool
The horns in this song are the truth and it’s basically a guy just calling out to everyone and coughing every once in a while. Crushing it. Not going to lie I feel preeeettttyyyy great when he shouts it out to the ladies who have real hair and fingernails and a job and I can make some noise. LIFE GOALS.
14. Hip Hop Hooray- Naughty by Nature
I don’t have much to say about this song other than the fact that I felt obligated to include it because I ripped the title for this playlist. Also there’s a guy named Treach in Naughty By Nature, which is an interesting choice for hardcore rap name. Let’s move onto some really cool AF rap names…
15. C.R.E.A.M- Wu Tang Clan
But seriously could there be a cooler collection of rapper names than Wu Tang Clan? RZA, Method Man, Ol Dirty Bastard, Ghostface Killah, Inspectah Deck… so fre$h. I’m not obsessed with this song but I put a little Wu Tang on for my favorite rapper The Reevolution and he BETTER ‘preciate it.
Most Disturbing Flow: “Everyday I escape from Jakes givin’ chase, sellin’ base, Smokin’ bones in the staircase.” Ya know, just a regular day.