Parks & Rec, much like The Office, is full of quirky and hilarious characters that I could write one million blogs about. I’m focusing on Tom Haverford this time around because we all have a lot we could learn from him. Tom was the most creative little nugget in Pawnee, always coming up with inventions and phrases. As someone who rarely says an entire word, even I learned a few new abbrevs from Tommy Havs and I believe it would be beneficial to us all to start working in the following top phrases from Tom into every day lingo.

1. Tum Grums. I’m hungry roughly every 30 minutes and it probably get exhausting for the people around me to hear over and over again that I’m hungies. Throwing in that I have the “tum grums” every once in a while could really spice things up. Plus when my blood sugar gets low and I turn into a raging bitch-monster only to be tamed by chips and candy, using this adorbs phrase will make me seem more endearing and less threatening.

2. Winnie the Boo. Enough with this BAE shit…Tommy had it down when he rattled off all the terms of endearment he was brainstorming for Ann (when they dated for a hot second.) This was my personal favorite because it just rolls right off the tongue and maybe even will make you think of your sig other wearing just a t-shirt, no pants.

3. Fart Attack. This was obviously a case-specific phrase in reference to when Jerry has a heart attack and uncontrollably farts at the same time. If I recall correctly, Tom is the first one to demand a doctor call it a Fart Attack and I’ve never wished to witness this incident more. Mark my words, I will be 90 years old and still giggle like a child when I hear the word fart. Not sorry bout it.

4. ‘Tails. Most people shorten details to deets, but Tom went with ‘tails because it showed innovation. It really doesn’t hurt to switch things up but I might have a hard time catching onto this one. A couple years ago I picked up the phrase “fuzzy on the deets” from Barstool to describe my drunken haze and I feel like tossing “Fuzzy on the ‘tails” doesn’t roll of the tongue quite as nicely. We’ll work on this one.

5. Treat Yo’ Self! A Tom and Donna combo creation, this is more like a necessary tradition rather than just a phrase, but can obviously be snuck into every day convo as well. For a day every year they treat themselves to lavish gifts and spa treatments and scream TREAT YO’ SELF a lot. I too have decided to do this every time I make an obnoxious purchase on my dirt low income and you know what? It makes me feel like a G-D Queen.

BONUS: Food Abbrevs- Zerts, Hot Choccy, Sandoozles. I’m especially fond of Hot Choccy since two of my friends went through a tough phase of calling Hot Chocolate “Hot Cho Cho” and making me want to rip my ears clean off my head. I’ll have to introduce them to the land of the Hot Choccy. Zerts for Desserts and Sandoozles instead of sandwiches just SOUND cooler…and that’s all that really matters in life. To sound as swagalicious as Tommy Fresh.