JUice

Weekly JUice

1. It’s only fair that since I teased this on last week’s JUice, I include the full ad this week. Here’s Budweiser’s Super Bowl installment of puppy-horsey love and a super smoke farmer. I want to be up front with you guys and tell you that I did have some tear action while watching this and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Also I’m a little irritated that wolves get a bad rep in this very animal friendly ad because the wolves that I know personally from The Wild in Chittenango, NY are basically puppies as well and not evil puppy-eaters.

2. Deflategate was over-talked about and pretty stupid.(Mostly because I’m not football savvy enough to even understand what was going on) But this clip from Jimmy Kimmel with hot celebs doing hilarious Boston accents is the stuff:

3. Missy Elliott to join Katy Perry’s Halftime show. This is still just a rumor but I’m reporting it like it’s true because I want it to happen. I wrote in my High School Dance mix yesterday how I was missing my grl Missy Elliott and would like her to come back stat. There is a lot of potential for her to own this year’s half time show if she makes an appearance (and sings Work It) and hopefully overshadow the fact that Lenny Kravitz will unfortunately be a part of the show. Also Katy Perry wore this outfit to the presser yesterday and I puked.

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4a. Emma Watson is cast as Belle in the Beauty & the Beast movie. I don’t have an aggressive opinion about this either way, she’ll probably do great but I wouldn’t have pegged her as the Belle of Hollywood.The reason I’m posting this headline is solely so that I can include the opening song from Beauty & the Beast.

“MARIE, THE BAGUETTES, HURRY UP.”-The meanest husband in the world. “I NEED SIX EGGS.”- The worst mom in the world dropping her 10 babies on the ground. Also not nitpicking here but are we sure there wasn’t ANYONE else who could’ve also nailed the part of Belle? Jus Sayin.

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4b. While we’re on the topic of Disney princesses, they have just announced their very first Latina princess, Elena of Avalor. Elena is wearing the same outfit as the salsa dancer emoji. I know I make this comparison pretty often but it’s usually spot on.

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And to that I say, original princesses FOREVA. Seriously, stop trying to one-up the classics cause it will never happen.(Cough, cough, Frozen.) Also for everyone who complains there wasn’t diversity in the older princesses, we had Jasmine the Arabian princess. And Ariel the redhead. Diversity up the wazoo. Anyway, I would appreciate it if in the event that Disney continues to have a new princess every year, that they could separate their princess merchandise from the classics. If I get one more band aid that puts Cinderella next to Rapunzel like they’re BFF’s I’m going to sue. All princesses post-2000 are new age and thus should have separate merch. I rest my case.

5. Suge Knight was arrested for involvement in a fatal hit and run while filming “Straight Outta Compton”. No seriously. That sounds like a made up headline. Could Suge Knight be more of a gangster? Suge was a part of the East Coast vs. West Coast battles in the 90’s and people legit think he killed Tupac and then Biggie to cover it up. Also he’s been shot like 10 times. He was shot at Kanye’s pre-VMA party in 2008 and then he was shot 6 times at Chris Brown’s VMA party last year.(How one gets shot 6 times and just shakes it off is baffling to me.) Bruh, stop going to the VMA’s. In fact, Suge should probably just stop leaving his house. His rap sheet details stabbing, domestic violence, robbery, drugs, aggravated assault, parole violations… Seriously don’t F with Suge Knight. He quite literally embodies the term THUG LYFE. Also ironic that his name comes from his nickname “Sugar Bear”. Does this look like a sugar bear to you? Hope everyone in the jail he’s heading to is prepared for fuzzy wuzzy Sugar Bear’s arrival.

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